Straight out of cops...

So last night at the Stiffie house, you would have thought we were right smack dab in the middle of an episode of the show cops.
I was in the kitchen making a gallon of sweet tea, and Frank was in the living room playing with Mady. Out in the alley we heard a loud commotion. This is not out of the ordinary around here, the people in the alley always seem to be drinking/fighting/causing some kind of disturbance, but we usually just ignore it...well, actually, we watch from the window for a little bit, then we ignore it. Well, this time it wasn't just guys being stupid, there were girls too. There was extra loud screaming, and cursing, and girls yelling "Get the f*ck in the house...let him the h&ll alone" etc.
Well, Frank is staring out the back door at this point, more for the sake of making sure that any fights didn't end up landing on my new car. I'm still in the kitchen making tea, listening to everything thats going on. I yelled at Frank to come back from the door and not get involved (the last thing we need is our house and cars getting vandalized because we were being nosy or bossy). He turned around to talk to me and we hear loud screaming and screetching. By the time Frank turned back around, people were scattering and yelling and running. This made me extra curious, so i had to go to the window and see what was going on.
To my surprise, i see a guy laying on the ground, and he looked dead. I yelled to Frank "What happened to that guy?!", and of course he didn't know either, so i dropped what i was doing and ran outside. I normally wouldn't get involved in other peoples fights like this, but if something serious happened to this kid, i couldn't stand idly by and do nothing. By the time i got to the kid on the ground, the people that beat him up and all the others were scattering. At first, i DID think this guy was dead, but i finally found a pulse. You would have thought it was a raid on a bush party or something, the way they all piled into cars and sped away.
By the time this guy was concious again, he was very confused and yelling at everyone (apparently he was drunk or something, and had no idea what was going on or what happened). Around that same time, our neighbors from down the block had heard all the yelling and made their way up to see what was going on. The guy from the ground got up and starting freaking out and swinging at people, including our down the block neighbor. Apparently he had no idea we were just there to make sure he wasn't dead, not the people actually hurting him. The car full of kids that beat him up went flying by the front of the house doing probably 60mph, and someone called the cops (who just happened to be at Turkey Hill...i know!) In less than a minute there was 1 cop car after the kids that beat the guy up, and 3 cop cars in the alley with us. I'm telling you, this was one of the more eventful evenings we've had here in a while. After talking to all of us, they tried to calm the beat up guy down and he was having none of it, so they were forced to handcuff him, put him up against the cop car and everything...the whole 9 yards, like we were on Cops!!
And you all wonder why we are ready to move already!