Thursday, April 30, 2009

It's the end of the world as we know it, and i feel swine...

I feel it my duty as a blogger, to warn you of many of the evils of the world, such as SPAM, the Wiggles, and the Snuggie. Now we have a new evil that i feel i must discuss with all of you. It is the well known Swine Flu outbreak.

Why go to the World Health Organization webpage, when you can come here? Who are you going to trust, people with an MD after their name, or someone who plays peek-a-boo and patty cake all day?! The answer is obvious, my friends.

I recently read that they believe they found "Patient Zero" in Mexico, yet they are delaying closing the border. What is it going to take people?! We have a pandemic on our hands here!

For those of you who are worried about how to prevent the spread of this piggy flu, i am going to give you some helpful tips to pretect yourself and your family:

1) Wear a mask. Nothing like keeping panic to a minimum than by walking outside like you were just infected with SARS. Michael Jackson got the message. He'll be safe. He'll be our leader when this whole thing finally ends and there are only a few people left. Here are a few suggestions:

Childrens Mask Pictures, Images and Photos
Predator mask Pictures, Images and Photos
Stormtrooper Mask Pictures, Images and Photos

2) Invest in some stylish clothing options, to help keep the swine at bay. Here are some options for you:

wrap Pictures, Images and Photos
LockAndKey Pictures, Images and Photos
Snuggie Pictures, Images and Photos

3) Don't touch your mouth or face after touching doorknobs, public restroom faucets, money, or anything that has been on a VH1 Reality TV show. Not only will you contract Swine Flue, but there's a good chance you will also get Hep C and Herpes

brett michaels Pictures, Images and Photos
flava Pictures, Images and Photos
Daaaang Pictures, Images and Photos

4) Stay away from Mexico. Unless you happen to be named Heidi and Spencer, and are there on your honeymoon. In that case, i suggest you participate in a running of the pigs excursion. I'm sure you'll be fine!

Spencer & Heidi Pictures, Images and Photos

5) And lastly, whatever you do, totally freak out and panic, because you WILL DIE!!

Thank you. Be safe, and good luck!

1 comment:

Megan R. said...
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